Right now this is my theme song.
THEN WHAT HAPPENS?
Then the baby chews its way out of her and she dies.
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
I wish. No. It just breaks a bunch of her bones and her spine and stuff so Edward has to make her a vampire.
THIS WON ‘CHILDREN’S BOOK OF THE YEAR’?
I think that was sales based. You can’t underestimate the American 50+ women’s demographic. They’ll literally buy anything with a sex scene in it.
OH GOD! EWWW. OH, EW.
DARREN, GRAB SOME PAPER TOWEL OR A SHOE OR A FLAMETHROWER OR SOMETHING! THERE’S ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT’S JUST A THOUSAND HORRIBLE WISPY LEGS OVER BY THE TOILET!
I GUESS. JUST HURRY, PLEASE. IF IT MOVES I’LL THROW UP.
Lookin’ at you lookin’ at me…
HOLY SHIT. STEVE THE TUBE. I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SINCE HIGH SCHOOL. HOW ARE YOU? STILL A TUBE I SEE. THAT’S COOL. I’M IN ADVERTISING NOW. I WORK DOWN ON 35TH.
Twin Cats Always Mirror Each Other in Sleep
Scientists are baffled by twin cats, Merry and Pippin, who reportedly always sleep in an exact mirror image of one another.
“Even if we place them in disparate starting positions or in separate rooms, they somehow always wind up sleeping exactly like the other,” said leading cat biologist and feline sleep expert Dr. Tobias Winslow. ”I’ve never seen anything like it.”
A polysomnogram revealed nothing out of the ordinary about the cats’ brain functions, eye movements, muscle activity, breathing or heart rhythms. ”We had expected to find that Merry and Pip were synched up on an internal level,” explained Winslow, “but it is literally just in the way they position their bodies for slumber.”
More tests will be done later this month during a scheduled comprehensive sleep study.
WELCOME HOME. I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE IN A BAD MOOD FROM WORKING SO HARD SO I CREATED MANY FUN SURPRISES FOR YOU ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
SEVERAL SURPRISES WERE MADE INSIDE MY OWN BODY, WHICH IS VERY CLOSE TO MY HEART, SPATIALLY.
SEVERAL OTHERS ARE ART PROJECTS I MADE USING SIMPLE HOUSEHOLD ITEMS LIKE YOUR TRASH, THE FLAVORLESS MARSHMALLOW STUFF INSIDE THE COUCH, AND THE CONTENTS OF THE PANTRY.
THANK YOU FOR NOT SHUTTING THE PANTRY DOOR, BY THE WAY. THERE WERE SO MANY USEFUL ART SUPPLIES IN THERE.
Sup Ladies? I’m Ray.